Wordless Wednesday: First Batch of the Season

Random Tuesday Thoughts - The Sucky Edition

1) I'm on Day 4 of Operation Quit Smoking. I'm on edge. I want to scream. My temper is short. I feel so angry about everything. My body is craving the nicotine. I know it. I rationally know how it all works. This is a battle of wills and willpower. I have to win! Besides I'm the idiot that started smoking again socially after quitting over 11 years ago. I don't want my kids to smoke. I have no choice but to quit.

2) Two people that almost everyone in my department at work have spoken to on the phone have passed away. The woman had a heart attack. The other, a man was murdered. He and his wife were murdered by her supposed lover. He killed them, then shot himself. They had 2 kids. One in college. The other, a son. Only 16 yrs old. He was able to escape. Its tragic and sad. We are pretty speechless at work.

3) I broke a major rule when you have a yard sale. Whatever doesn't sell is supposed to go straight in the trash or preferably Goodwill or The Salvation Army. I did get rid of a few things with Freecycle but the rest is sitting by my front door. I need to throw it all away. Except for the clothes. I'm giving them to the Interfaith Clothing Donation place. But the rest of our "junk" yea, I'm going to throw it away.

4) I picked up my kids yesterday and they came back from their dad's house with two more bags than they left with. Apparently they took a trip to their dad's storage unit where a lot of there stuff is. I'm sure it was like a visit to a toy store. All their old toys were new again. The problem is we live in a 2 bedroom apartment. The kids share a bedroom. THERE IS NO ROOM FOR ANYTHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5) My love and I drove to Greenwood, South Carolina on Friday for a wedding. It was an 8 and a half hour drive one way. I drove the whole way on Friday. Once we checked into our hotel room. I was ready to party. And we did. WAY. TO. HARD. I was sick. Thought I was going to die. I promised the Big Guy above that I would never drink again if he would just make the headache go away. Thankfully the wedding was at 6pm. I had plenty of time to rest. Unfortunately, I still haven't recovered.

Go check out Keely's blog for more randomness. She's a great hostess!

Yard Sale Saturday

Our apartment complex hosted a yard sale on Saturday. This means they advertised, put out signs and let us pile our crap in two parking spaces in front of the Leasing Office. Ha! They're smart aren't they?

I called to reserve our spot because my kids read the sign and realized they could sell their junk for cold hard cash. They were excited about the money. I was thrilled they starting going through their old toys and cleaning up.

So then Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday came and went. I pondered how I could get out of it. I'm known for signing up for something, then dreading it and sometimes just blowing it off. Not my favorite character trait and I'm trying to set a good example for the kids. I listened to the voice mail from an overly enthusiastic Malcolm from the Leasing Office giving me the deets. I felt guilty. It's not that I didn't want to participate. I was tired from a long week. Gathering our crap, cleaning and slapping it with a price sticker was low on my priority list.

Alas, I gave in. I rushed around our apartment on Friday night. Did some quick research on pricing. Tweeted with my friend Maria who is the queen of yard-sales and got busy.

I set my alarm for 6:45 am (I know, freaking ridiculous for a Saturday morning) so I could run to the store and get change. I also wanted the kids to sell Lemonade. You know, to keep them out of my hair to practice customer service and math skills. The alarm never went off. It was set for weekdays only. I bolted out of bed at 7:45. The kids and I threw everything in the car and rushed to set up.

The yard sale was set for 8:00-noon. I know how these things works. People lurk around early! Waiting for their watch to strike 8:00 am exactly then pounce! Thankfully we weren't the only residents running late.

It didn't take too long for me to set up our table. There wasn't much there.









I think I priced everything reasonably. I only had to haggle with one family. The cars came in waves and it was crazy! They would pull into a parking space and before the vehicle was in park all the occupants jumped out and attacked! I sold all my higher priced items which was great. I listened to all Maria's tips and reorganized the table when thing were purchased.

The kids drove me insane! They were antsy and bored. They walked around to see what the other residents were selling. The Princess wanted everything! I was firm and said they could each buy one thing. It had to be under $2.00. They came back full of smiles.


Price: .50 cents. It's a bank and the nice lady put one quarter inside to get her started. I sprayed this sucker down with Lysol when we got home.


The Z-Man has wanted a skateboard for awhile. He already knows how to use it and do tricks and all those other boy things I don't understand. He was thrilled with his purchase for $1.50.

After 4 hours I made $50. Technically $45 because I owe my son $5 but I'm going to conveniently forget that fact. As much as he eats at 11 years old, he owes me money!

We packed the car back up with our junk that didn't sell. I broke a major yard sale rule by doing this. I should have driven everything directly to The Salvation Army but I didn't. The last time I donated items to them, I came back a second time with another carload and saw all my stuff crushed on the ground. Instead of The Salvation Army I have listed everything on Freecycle.

I'll definitely do this again. I'll organize ahead of time. Maybe. But it felt good to get rid of the clutter and the cold hard cash felt nice in my back pocket.

Back to School Night: The 6th Grade Edition

Tuesday was Back to School Night for Middle School. The Z-Man is in 6th grade. I arrived early to sell Spirit Wear for the PTSA. Yes, I am that mom. The bell rang and we were off to 1st period.

- The Z-Man has 2 male teachers and 5 female teachers. This is his first time ever having a male teacher. He thinks it's pretty cool.

- The entire school uses the ActivClassroom by Promethean. I had never seen this before. Think beyond chalkboards, beyond dry erase boards. It's amazing. I wanted to play with it.

- Either my eyesight is failing or the classrooms have horrible lighting.

- I'm scared shitless of 7th grade Math. The teacher gave us a quick quiz. I F.A.I.L.E.D. The question is at the end of this post.

- I wish I could sit in for 6th grade Reading. The teacher is someone I would have clung to when I was that age. Getting lost in books to escape the dysfunction that was my childhood. I wouldn't mind reliving Greek Mythology and taking a field trip to the Newseum.

- P.E. sounds as awful as I remember. The Locker Rooms still reek of prepubescent bodily changes.

- Indus Valley? No clue what that it but The Z-Man will be learning about it. Social Studies was never really my thing.

- English tested my memory of hyperbole's. I failed but we did get to use the ActiVote. Every student is assigned a number and an Activote button. I love interactive learning, technology and saving paper!

The year is off to a great start. Check in with me before, after and during the first school dance.

Now quick, what's the answer to the Math question? Leave your answer in the comments section. No cheating!! *click on the picture to enlarge*

Random Tuesday Thoughts - because I'm too lazy to think of my own title

I've never participated in this before but it sounds about right for how I'm feeling so off we go...

- I attempted to learn the code to make bullet points for this post but gave up.

- I have gray hairs...that I have not plucked. I always snatch those suckers out. Does this mean I'm accepting my age or just lazy?

- I want to call out every nasty woman at my job that doesn't wash their hands after they use the bathroom. I know who YOU are and I want to put you on blast. And by the way, just rinsing your hands with water after you pee, is NOT okay.

- I want another tattoo but apparently not bad enough to actually get it done. I want this on my wrist. (Page 2, top left corner, 1st one that says Love with two flowers.) I haven't done it yet because I'm very busy with my kids, work and stuff scared shitless it's gonna hurt!

- I have a wedding to attend on September 26th. I've had months to start exercising, eating better, shedding some major poundage. I haven't done a damn thing. I'm going to do my best to avoid pictures being taken of me and my fat ass. Did I mention that I have nothing to wear? I don't do dresses...gah!

- Kanye West makes good music. When he opens his mouth to speak, things go downhill, rapidly. I bet his mama wishes she could smack him upside the head.

- I can't believe we're in the 3rd week of school already. I'm exhausted.

- I hate bills. I hate paying bills. I hate that I never have enough money to pay my bills.

- Winning the Mega Millions would certainly help with above mentioned problem.

- As usual, I'm wishing it was Friday like now.

- Special shout out to my mommy who reads my blog every now and again. That's nice but also freaks me out. So far, I haven't spilled any of her dark and dirty secrets.

Ok, that's all I got for now. Make sure to check out Keely for all things wonderful and random. She's an expert at this stuff.

8 Years

8 years? Really? Some days it feels like 9/11 happened eons ago. Some days it feels like yesterday. A moment in time that forever changed history. My history. Your history. Our history as a country.

On September 11, 2001 I dropped my son off at daycare. He had turned 3 the month before. I hopped on the highway to head to work. I turned on my usual morning drive radio station. The conversation was fast, frenzied and calm all at the same time. It took 10 minutes to drive to work. I remember looking at other drivers on the road, their faces were distraught. I couldn't understand what the Dee Jay's were saying. They didn't even understand what was happening.

A plane had flown into the North Tower of The World Trade Center. I was able to gather that part. I didn't understand why, when? What the hell was going on? It felt like a dream, a stunt, make believe. I pictured my then three year old building blocks as high as he could and knocking them down with a toy plane. Had that really happened? In real life? You have got to be fucking kidding me!

I worked at The American Red Cross at the time. When I got to my desk, I still wasn't sure what was happening. My co-workers and I went online for details. Everything was sketchy. This was around 9 am. We pulled a TV into the conference room and turned on the news.

The video, the image, the plane circling, then flying into the Tower. INTO THE FUCKING TOWER! I don't remember who started crying first. Before long, we all were. Who in the hell? Why in the hell? I remember thinking the world was coming to an end. All I wanted was to pick up my son from daycare, hide in a closet, hold him tight and cry.

We continued watching the news as reports came in about a hijacked plane in Pennsylvania. The plane flying into The Pentagon. A second plane destroying The South Tower.

I ran to my desk and called my then husband who worked in downtown Washington DC close to The Pentagon. It was busy. The phone never rang. I thought I would lose my mind if I heard, "All circuits are busy" one more damn time! I tried my mom who also works in DC. Busy, no answer. I didn't know what to do. I called my son's daycare, they were on Lock down, all the kids were fine.

I stayed at work, I was scared to leave. I couldn't stand still. My heart was racing. I was sweating. I was crying. I was terrified. I kept making my way back to that TV and watching the footage. New Yorkers running for their lives to escape the glass, debris and dust from the collapsing towers. Trapped in those buildings, begging for help. Jumping from windows to their death to avoid dying from smoke inhalation or the building falling to pieces on top of them. I will never forget that image. Men and women screaming for help. Having no choice. Fear taking over and suicide the only answer.

I had images in my mind of the people on the plane, looking out the window, seeing their plane heading directly into The Towers and The Pentagon. The hijacked plane taken over and diverted in Pennsylvania. The bravery of Todd Beamer and the other passengers on Flight 93. I was tortured for years about what they must have been thinking. What it was like to know you were going to die in a most horrific way.

My then husband and mom were safe. My former Sister-in-Law who works at the Pentagon in the wing that was hit was not there that day. I know so many people who woke up late, missed their train or bus, called out sick and were spared. Those stories gave me hope in the midst of sadness.

As the years pass, some details begin to fade. Regardless of conspiracy theories (I have a few), so many "facts" that don't add up, what Bush knew and did or didn't do...the truth remains. Thousands of people lost their lives.

On the Anniversary of September 11th, this year and every year, I remember the victims and their families. I'm eternally grateful to the hundreds of rescue and recovery workers who risked their own lives to save another. I remember American's coming together in a way I had never seen before in my lifetime. All other issues put aside, we united in our grief.

I don't want to remember but I can never forget.

Obama Drama

Today President Obama spoke to America's children. The theme of the speech was "My Education, My Future." I read the text of speech here before the live broadcast. I didn't have a problem with the overall message.

As I watched the speech today, I didn't hear anything new. It was the same speech my dad drilled into me on a daily basis. Work hard, education is important, you can't go far in life without an education, try your best, ask for help, be confident, believe in yourself.

My dad came from a large family. He dropped out of school in the 8th grade and started working to support his family. He always regretted not receiving his High School diploma.

The anger and outrage at President Obama and The White House is misdirected in my opinion. It's not just about the speech. Conservative's are pissed at the Administration's determination to overhaul our health care system. If it's not the health care debate, it's something else. There will always be something else.

It's the price you pay for being a Liberal in a Conservative Country. It's the price you pay for being the first African-American President in a country where racism is very much alive! We live in a country where we have freedom of speech. We can agree to disagree. You can be mad as hell that we have a Black man as President, and/or disagree with his policies, opinions and views. I'm thankful we have these rights.

My concern with parents that pulled their children out of class during the speech is that it's disrespectful to the leader of our country. Teach your children to be open minded, research both sides of the story and come to their own conclusion.

Our county school system did not air the speech. I wasn't shocked. I was prepared to play the video and watch with my kids tonight and discuss. My son, who is in 6th grade said he already saw it. One of his teacher's played it in the classroom. I'm disturbed by what he said:

- Some of the kids put their heads down at their desks
- Some of the kids spent that hour reading or drawing
- Some of the kids said it was boring

I asked my son what he learned. After some prodding, I discovered he did pay attention. The overall message was received. Do your best in school. Education is important. Make good choices and when you don't understand, ask questions. Guess what right wing conservatives? My son wasn't brainwashed and he did not become a Socialist.

March for Maddie

Its been 5 months since Maddie passed away. I don't know about you but my world has never been the same. Not one single day has passed when I don't think about Maddie, Heather and Mike. I'm very grateful that they have chosen to share their grieving process with us.

All over the country teams were forming for the March of Dimes walk in honor of Maddie. Nic of My Bottles Up organized a team named My Bottles Up for Maddie. I signed up to participate. I challenged myself to raise $500 in 5 days in Honor of Maddie. I was excited to be a part of something bigger than me.

The walk was in Baltimore which is over an hour drive from my house. That day it rained and rained and rained. It was like a monsoon. I left in enough time to get there before the start time. But the rain...I could barely see the road. I pressed on and finally made it. I was late. Nik and the rest of the team had to start without me.

I parked my car, checked in. I turned in my $330 that I raised, picked up my t-shirt, a map and started on the walk. I immediately started to cry. I felt absolutely awful that I was late. I didn't want to walk the 4 miles alone.

But I did. I walked every last mile and I had so much time to think. Throughout the walk there were posters with pictures and family stories about their premature babies. I stopped to read almost every one. I thought of Maddie every time. The stories were heartbreaking, heartwarming, sad and inspiring all at the same time.

I realized how blessed I am that both my children were born full term and healthy. I prayed for Heather & Mike. I prayed for all the families who have lost their children. I cried...a lot... It turned out to be a very cathartic 4 mile walk.

I was one of the last people to cross the finish line. I made my way back to my car and was already writing this post in my head. As time passed, I didn't write the post. I told myself I was just procrastinating.

The truth was I was embarrassed and ashamed that I was late and couldn't walk with my team. I didn't meet my goal of $500. I should have written this a long time ago and been proud of what I DID do to honor Maddie. I still struggle with "it" being okay if things don't go as planned.

I discovered yesterday that a friend took her life. I have been completely and utterly devastated by this. It made me realize that life is too short. Not that I didn't already know this but sometimes it takes an awful tragedy to put everything else into perspective. Maddie was here one day and gone the next. It's not fair!

I decided to write this post and share the pictures I took. I've decided to stop feeling like I let Nic, Heather and Mike down by falling short of the goals I set for myself. I won't beat myself up anymore. I did the best I could. I raised $330 in honor of Maddie for the March of Dimes. I completed the 4 miles, in the rain, by myself because it was and always will be important to me.

No matter how I feel or have felt these past five months it's nothing compared to what Heather and Mike have been through. Maddie has touched my life in ways I never imagined or thought possible. I think that was her mission in life from Day 1.

Wordless Wednesday

First Day of School

Despite the drama from the night before, The Prince and The Princess both had a great first day of school. Whew!

It was hard to wake them up. It was hard for me to wake up. But we made it. I always take off work the first day of school. That's also part of my tradition. I love to drop the kids off and pick them up. :) I miss that part of when I was a SAHM.

Despite being extremely tired, I think the kids look happy in these pics.

The Princess wanted me to take a picture of her new shoes. I like them.
I told her I would get a pair and we can be twins.

Here she is. Ready to tackle 1st grade. She said she wished I didn't have to go to work, that I could be 6 again and we could go to 1st grade together. I told her that sounded like a fabulous idea.

The Prince and his Best Friend after the 1st day of 6th grade. They came out of school laughing and reliving every moment. I also found out which girls are on their Radar. (I forbid my son from kissing girls, dating them and everything else! When I told him, he said, "Mooommmm!!!!)

After school my best friend and I took the kids to Rita's Italian Ice to celebrate.



The first week of school is always fun and games. When the homeworks starts rolling in we'll see if the kids are still smiling.

Not So Great Beginnings

School started on August 31st. If you follow me on Twitter, you know the night before was a disaster. The Prince and The Princess spent the weekend with their dad. He said they were going to spend Saturday in New York City. He said they would be back between 4:30-5:00 pm on Sunday evening. He says a lot of things. Most of which are stupid. I agreed to this weekend trip because I expected they would be home in time to prepare for THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL. I was bamboozled and I feel like a fool for trusting him!

I created the day before school starts traditions when my son entered Kindergarten. I cook dinner. We pick out their outfits, double check that their backpacks are ready to go, pack lunch and decide on what I will make them for breakfast in the morning. It's exciting and I look forward to spending that time with them.

This year was very important to me. The Prince started Middle School. The Princess sashayed her way into 1st grade. Two different schools, two different start times and I have to drive them both in the morning AND get to work on time.

The Ex-Factor returned MY kids at 12:30 in the damn morning! I told my love to answer the door because if I saw him, I was sure I would punch him in the face. I would have punched him the balls but he doesn't have any. Never has. I digress.

Finally the kids are home. They are exhausted, hungry and they stink. They bathed, put on PJ's and I had them both go straight to bed. My plans for our night before school traditions were ruined!

I ended up going outside to confront The Ex-Factor. He was getting into the drivers seat of their rented van about to pull off. He saw me, got out and walked over. He kept his distance. I will give him that, he's not 100% idiotic. He said to me, (inject smart ass sarcastic tone) "YES?" I explained calmly (yes, I really was...at first) that this was unacceptable. I reviewed all the reasons this was wrong wrong WRONG. They start school in a few hours, I was told they would be home earlier, why didn't you call me, why didn't you answer your phone or respond to my text messages, the kids are going to be so tired when they wake up etc... He never apologized. All he said was, "I told you we would be home very late." I responded with HELL TO THE NO YOU DIDN'T! You said between 4:30-5:30pm. If you had said you would have been home this late I NEVER would have let the kids go. I, unlike you, have common sense. And I may or may not have called him a jackass piece of shit loser.

All the while his girlfriend is watching this from the passenger seat. I was so angry that I couldn't sleep. My blood was boiling. It is impossible to fight or argue with this man because he doesn't respond. To anything. I don't like to argue, or fight and I don't like confrontation. When it comes to general BS I let things go. I may vent with a friend or two but then I'm over it. But when it comes to my kids who I love more than anything, I don't play.

He walked to the van and drove off. I went inside and took care of the kids. I cried once they went to sleep.

This is the life of a single mom.